Backpacks, Burnout, and Invisible Expectations

School’s back, work’s wild, and your to-do list is probably in six places.

Yes, just like all the memes and cringe videos you’re seeing, my kids go back to school this week. Well, one of them does, but hey, it’s a start.

Yes, it’s still bittersweet; here goes my preteen, still figuring out life, himself, and how to brush his teeth without being asked 400 times, and he’s not completely corrupted by mass consumerism, the internet, and late-stage capitalism. I’m sending him off to a place he tolerates at best and loathes at worst. The public school system (at least where I live) isn’t built for exploration or joy. It’s built for compliance, testing, and ensuring we make little worker bees. It seems like the most exploration they get is figuring out how to get past the district blockers on their Chromebooks (which is pretty entertaining).

There has to be a better way to help kids (and people) learn than sitting through several hours of endless worksheets and performance reviews.

I’ll digress, and get on with da bits…

Low Engagement, High Cost

There are so many studies that show how much disengaged employees cost. Yet somehow, the burnout treadmill keeps rolling, and companies act shocked and blame the individuals when they check out and/or leave.
So if we can actually get employees motivated (hot tip: money isn’t typically the best motivator), we can be more profitable?! Wild!

Also, isn’t it just more enjoyable to work with people who actually give a damn? Or are we just going to continue perpetuating “corporate fun” and pretend that the sterile jokes management makes are actually funny?

ONE LIST, PEOPLE.

Why do people insist on tracking work everywhere besides where it needs to be? It could be a sign that the tools you're using suck (more on that in the next bit), but I'm always shocked how work that needs to be done seems to come out of the woodwork (usually at the worst time). Have ONE backlog, in ONE spot. If you are tracking your backlog on multiple spreadsheets, hit the brakes, and combine that garbage.

If you want things to get done, put them in ONE spot. That’s it. One list. One source of truth. It’s the easiest way to tell how much work you are trying to shove in your bucket.

Bad UX = No Usage

The higher the barrier, the less likely people are to do the thing. This applies to everything:

Want to ship features? Don’t make your devs fill out a 15-page doc no one reads.

Want your kids to clean up? Don’t design a seven-step system with color-coded bins and a rotating schedule.

Want your team to track their work? Make it as simple and fast as possible (you know.. not Jira).

Want to work out regularly? Don’t design an overly complicated workout that requires special clothes and machines to get started. Keep it simple and easy to jump in.

Ease of use matters more than most people realize. If it’s too complicated to do consistently, it’s not going to happen.

Clarity > Assumptions

Clarity Over Assumptions The number of conflicts that start with “Well, I thought you knew…” could probably power a small city. Whether you’re giving your kid a new chore or explaining a project to your team, assume nothing. Spell it out. Then check for understanding. Even when it feels obvious. ...Especially when it feels obvious. Clarity isn’t micromanaging; it’s just removing the guesswork so people can do their best without tripping over invisible expectations.

Catch Them Doing It Right

Mistakes announce themselves loudly, the dishwasher flood, the “obvious”bug in the application, the sibling wrestling match in the hallway. Wins tend to be quieter. A kid sitting down to do homework without being told. A team member asks a great clarifying question before starting a task. Catching and naming those moments takes intentional effort, but it pays off in spades. A quick “Hey, I saw how you handled that; nice work” is like a mini confidence deposit that compounds over time.

As a leader, parent, manager, or even just a good teammate, you need to be on the lookout for those moments and shout them out from the rooftops.

Confidence ≠ Competence

The Dunning-Kruger Effect: where people think they know more than they do because they don’t know enough to know how much they don’t know.

It’s alive and well on YouTube, LinkedIn, and that one person at work who talks your ear off but you can’t walk away because you don’t want to be rude but your mind has wandered into just thinking about excuses somehow get out of this conversation and you keep hoping someone else will walk by so you can pawn this person off to them but no one is coming so you just keep saying, “oh yeah” or “yup, crazy” to be polite and they eat that up and keep telling you more and more to show how much they know and dear god, they wont stop, and that’s all you want to do is just silently stare at your laptop for a bit because you are overtaxed just like this runon sentence... OK fine, I’ll stop.
The point is, be curious and skeptical about that tool or person that’s going to solve all your problems. If it were that easy, it’d be done already. Nothing is going to “10x your team” by paying them a pile of money.

Sometimes You Just Need a Captain

Have you ever joined a group where no one steps up as the obvious leader? Everyone’s kind, capable, but progress stalls. Eventually, morale and communication dip, and everyone feels aimless.

Then someone finally steps up. They ask a question, suggest a plan. It might not be the right plan, but suddenly people are moving.

That’s what leadership often is: not having the perfect answer, but giving people permission to start and showing that it’s OK to speak up and ask questions.

Move Your Body (Start Simple, Stay Consistent)

One of the best things I’ve done for my mental health this year is exercise. Not some full-blown life hack, just regular movement that actually stuck.

Y’all probably know I jumped into outrigger canoeing this year, a wonderful hobby that keeps me active because it’s fun, I’m out in nature, and because I have a team counting on me to show up. It’s become a core part of my week. The workout is great, but the accountability and community are what make it consistent.

You don’t have to jump into something intense. Start with a morning walk, ten pushups before bed, stretching at lunch. Keep the barrier low (how do you like that tie-back?!) and the expectations reasonable. The key is not to skip more than one day; then you start forming the wrong habit.

Get that heart pumpin’!

---

Whether you're a parent, a manager, or both (god help you), here's your reminder to communicate clearly and regularly, catch small wins, and maybe delete a few tools instead of adding more.

Also, if your house is already full of shoe pileups, last-minute lunch packing, and missing Chromebook chargers… same ((🤙))

Be excellent to each other,

//Trevor